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The highlights:
I'm now divorced.
I'm 46 years old tomorrow.
I'm moving out of the house.
I've been working part-time as an assistant since July last year! (Woo hoo!)
My savings are about to be nuked off the map with moving out costs.
I'm stumping again for "Send me money and be immortalized in a Lea Hernandez book."
Again with the long gaps in postings, not just because my Twitter feed takes the energy, but also because I was on the last leg of getting my divorce. The soon-to-be ex is now the ex. There are still papers to be typed, but as of about 2:30 Central on March 1st, my 24 year, 6 month and 22 day starter marriage was over, almost to the hour it started. Two years minus a week since the day I found out my long-time friend Dave Stevens had died and I realized I didn't want to spend any more time being married to the now-ex and that I could see it through this time.
Just in time for my 46th birthay, which is tomorrow, March 11th!
Yes, this is absolutely a cause for celebration! For various reasons, I have been wanting a divorce since the marriage was about two years old. For various reasons, I stayed. No one can say I'm a quitter. Well, they can, but they're wrong, so fuck 'em.
Did I get the Barbie Dream House I rebuilt from the ground up after it burned down? Yes and no. I still own roughly half a house, but I won't be living in it. I could if I wanted to, but I don't. I've been physically separated from the ex for almost two years. I'm rather a bit done with living with him.
Why not have the ex turfed and stay in the house? Because I can't afford to stay in it on my own and he can. I could've forced the issue in court, and likely ended up with a house that had to be sold. And selling it is about the last thing I want to do. Why?
Because my son Fox, who is autistic, needs to stay in the house. Full stop. Fox needs the continuity. He needs a place, that if it gets a bit wrecked from his Hagrid-sized body (he's now a 6" tall 14-year old),that's okay. He needs a yard. In short, Fox needs a place where he can be his wonderful self, and an apartment is not it. (Except for the swimming pool!)
Am I upset? Not really, and I'm surprised. The thought of leaving the Barbie Dream House a year ago was awful. This year, it's the right thing to do and I'm calm. I'm still the owner of half a house. I don't feel ripped off. I did what I had to do to keep from going to court and turning mine and the kid's lives into an ugly circus.
For example: my parents, to whom I'd stopped speaking in August 2007, showed up at the temporary hearing on May 1st last year...to testify on my ex's behalf. I have experienced some truly fucked-up shit, and that took the fucked-up shit cake and put a poo garnish on top. I really didn't want it to get any more messed up than that.
So what I am now is a 46-year-old (as of tomorrow) woman comicker starting from scratch with my daughter. I have my studio furniture, computer and supplies, I have my modest bedroom furniture, custody of Summer, decision-making power for Fox, and that's it. I've never lived on my own, owned my own car (do now), signed a lease alone (very soon). I never thought I'd be rebuilding again, let alone so soon after doing it the last time. But, as I've said many times, I built a kitchen alone from about 300 cubic feet of IKEA flatpack and enough swears to cover the floor of the Dubai Mall (it's 5.9 million square feet), so I can do anything!
Most of the kitchen stuff, save for my breadmaker and some bowls are staying, so that Fox has use of them and comfort from them, part of that continuity I'm trying to keep for him. I'm rebuilding the kitchen from the ground up (I mean, like starting from a soup ladle and colanders up), and I have to, since my budget means cooking at home is le must. A coffee and a burger is now the price of six or seven meals if I cook a chicken and Summer and I eat it for five days.
Yes, I am totally giving a link to my Amazon wishlist for the kitchen and bath. Yes, I am ALSO totally saying a gift (via payPal to divalea @ gmail .com) $15. will get you (or animal or friend or houseplant) drawn into Rumble Girls: RLO or The Garlicks as a character, and $50. will get you drawn in as a speaking character, and $75. will get you that AND a copy of whichever book comes out first (could be a while, but you'll get it).
Honestly, I am of extremely modest means (right now), and I'm getting extremely modest support. This move is costing me an arm and a leg in deposits, re-stocking the pantry with food, gas and paying for my own food until (and after) I move out. I've had regular (top-secret) work as an assistant since July, and work things are only getting better but I have been wiped out by medical costs, paying down debts, covering household costs, and caring for Summer and Fox.
So, I hope some of you want to have people or places in my books that look like you or are named after you, or are dying to buy a melon baller. Pass along this entry, by all means.
I'm now divorced.
I'm 46 years old tomorrow.
I'm moving out of the house.
I've been working part-time as an assistant since July last year! (Woo hoo!)
My savings are about to be nuked off the map with moving out costs.
I'm stumping again for "Send me money and be immortalized in a Lea Hernandez book."
Again with the long gaps in postings, not just because my Twitter feed takes the energy, but also because I was on the last leg of getting my divorce. The soon-to-be ex is now the ex. There are still papers to be typed, but as of about 2:30 Central on March 1st, my 24 year, 6 month and 22 day starter marriage was over, almost to the hour it started. Two years minus a week since the day I found out my long-time friend Dave Stevens had died and I realized I didn't want to spend any more time being married to the now-ex and that I could see it through this time.
Just in time for my 46th birthay, which is tomorrow, March 11th!
Yes, this is absolutely a cause for celebration! For various reasons, I have been wanting a divorce since the marriage was about two years old. For various reasons, I stayed. No one can say I'm a quitter. Well, they can, but they're wrong, so fuck 'em.
Did I get the Barbie Dream House I rebuilt from the ground up after it burned down? Yes and no. I still own roughly half a house, but I won't be living in it. I could if I wanted to, but I don't. I've been physically separated from the ex for almost two years. I'm rather a bit done with living with him.
Why not have the ex turfed and stay in the house? Because I can't afford to stay in it on my own and he can. I could've forced the issue in court, and likely ended up with a house that had to be sold. And selling it is about the last thing I want to do. Why?
Because my son Fox, who is autistic, needs to stay in the house. Full stop. Fox needs the continuity. He needs a place, that if it gets a bit wrecked from his Hagrid-sized body (he's now a 6" tall 14-year old),that's okay. He needs a yard. In short, Fox needs a place where he can be his wonderful self, and an apartment is not it. (Except for the swimming pool!)
Am I upset? Not really, and I'm surprised. The thought of leaving the Barbie Dream House a year ago was awful. This year, it's the right thing to do and I'm calm. I'm still the owner of half a house. I don't feel ripped off. I did what I had to do to keep from going to court and turning mine and the kid's lives into an ugly circus.
For example: my parents, to whom I'd stopped speaking in August 2007, showed up at the temporary hearing on May 1st last year...to testify on my ex's behalf. I have experienced some truly fucked-up shit, and that took the fucked-up shit cake and put a poo garnish on top. I really didn't want it to get any more messed up than that.
So what I am now is a 46-year-old (as of tomorrow) woman comicker starting from scratch with my daughter. I have my studio furniture, computer and supplies, I have my modest bedroom furniture, custody of Summer, decision-making power for Fox, and that's it. I've never lived on my own, owned my own car (do now), signed a lease alone (very soon). I never thought I'd be rebuilding again, let alone so soon after doing it the last time. But, as I've said many times, I built a kitchen alone from about 300 cubic feet of IKEA flatpack and enough swears to cover the floor of the Dubai Mall (it's 5.9 million square feet), so I can do anything!
Most of the kitchen stuff, save for my breadmaker and some bowls are staying, so that Fox has use of them and comfort from them, part of that continuity I'm trying to keep for him. I'm rebuilding the kitchen from the ground up (I mean, like starting from a soup ladle and colanders up), and I have to, since my budget means cooking at home is le must. A coffee and a burger is now the price of six or seven meals if I cook a chicken and Summer and I eat it for five days.
Yes, I am totally giving a link to my Amazon wishlist for the kitchen and bath. Yes, I am ALSO totally saying a gift (via payPal to divalea @ gmail .com) $15. will get you (or animal or friend or houseplant) drawn into Rumble Girls: RLO or The Garlicks as a character, and $50. will get you drawn in as a speaking character, and $75. will get you that AND a copy of whichever book comes out first (could be a while, but you'll get it).
Honestly, I am of extremely modest means (right now), and I'm getting extremely modest support. This move is costing me an arm and a leg in deposits, re-stocking the pantry with food, gas and paying for my own food until (and after) I move out. I've had regular (top-secret) work as an assistant since July, and work things are only getting better but I have been wiped out by medical costs, paying down debts, covering household costs, and caring for Summer and Fox.
So, I hope some of you want to have people or places in my books that look like you or are named after you, or are dying to buy a melon baller. Pass along this entry, by all means.
